Wide Open Spaces
by DaGirl32
Summary: AU: Derek and Mark are not dead. But April calls it quits, she stops being a soldier and starts to become a scared single mother. She leaves Seattle to New York to start her life as a single mom, but can Jackson change her mind? Or will the big apple... and friends change her mind?
1. Saving All My Love

AU: Mark and Derek are not dead but Lexie is. Mark is on the board for the hospital and it's still called Seattle grace.

April hadn't taken a deep breath in a long time. She was unhappy with the situation she had been thrown. All she wanted was Jackson; she wanted him to hold her one more time. She wanted Samuel back; she wanted Lexie back. April Kepner wanted a lot of things in life, but sadly never got what she asked.

April walked into Seattle Grace Hospital with a somber look on her face. She stayed quiet and to herself as she walked into her attending changing room. Alex Karev was already putting his scrub cap on getting ready to go out and save some lives.

She gave him a small smile and waited till he left to change into her scrubs. Since she's 11 weeks pregnant, she's beginning to show. She sluggishly put on her scrubs. Jackson had been avoiding her ever since he came back from saving some Army man's life.

"He's moving on; you need to move on as well. For the baby's sake."

April took a deep breath and plastered a fake smile on her face and walked into the halls of Seattle Grace. She hurried her way to the Er to begin her day.

April went to the nurse's station and started to look over some of the charts on file. Megan Carson, Age 23, complaints of abdomen pain, Vomiting and blurry vision. She checked in five minutes ago, and Dr. Reed has already seen her.

April took a deep breath and took the tablet and went to Megan. April pulled back the curtain and grimaced. Megan looked miserable and had a bucket in her lap.

"Hello Megan I'm Dr. Kepner, can you tell me when this pain started," April asked.

"Sometime…two days ag-" Megan didn't finish; she threw up again. April sighed.

"Can I see your stomach for a second please?"

Megan only nodded afraid she'd throw up again. April put her gloves on and took the bucket away from the girl. She started to apply slight pressure on her abdomen.

Megan hissed when April touched her lower left side. April took her hand away, she called for a nurse.

"Can you call Dr. Reed for me, tell him it's important," April said.

The nurse nodded and walked away swiftly.

"Megan when was the last physical activity you did in these last couple of days?"

"I feel when I was trying to get down the stairs, I'm moving into my apartment." Megan groaned.

"Dr. Kepner can you come here please, I need a consult."

April turned her head to see Mark Solan calling her name. She took a deep breath and gave an apologetic smile to Megan.

"I'll be right back if you need any help just page a nurse and they'll come get me," April said.

She handed the tablet to the next available nurse and told them to watch the girl. She walked over to Mark and gave another fake smile; nobody seemed to notice.

"I need you to watch this patient for me, don't worry just keep her company I'll be back," Mark instructed.

He took his gloves off and walked away from April and the patient. She took the tablet off her bedside and sat down. She took a deep breath.

"How far along are you?"

April opened her eye and looked at the patient. She looked relatively young, but looks are deceiving.

"Um excuse me, I'm not pregnant," April explained.

She felt like she was caught in a major lie. She was terrible at lying to people as well.

"I have four kids. I know that I'm tired breath, you should probably take a break." The girl said.

April looked perplexed, was her body screaming I'm pregnant?

"You don't want anyone to know your pregnant. Or Dr. Solan wouldn't have asked you to watch me. So I guess not even the dad knows?"

April felt like she was always taking deep breaths today.

"No, he doesn't. We're divorced, he works here too, and I'd appreciate it if you did not talk about this please." April pleaded with the patient.

The girl laughed, it wasn't a consenting smile but an ironic one.

"My name is Karen; it's okay I get that feeling. I used to work with Mark as a nurse. When my Husband and I divorced all, I did take a deep breath. I was tired of being pregnant for the third time and being divorced did not make it better." Karen explained.

April was happy someone understood her tiredness. She just needed some break.

April was thinking over her talk with Karen. She was clinging to the false hope that she and Jackson would ever see eye to eye and get back with one another. She needed to be happy; she needed to find her peace again.

April was eating lunch with Nathan. She could see Jackson and Mark eating along with Hunt. All of them laughing and having fun. She didn't understand how Jackson could act like the divorce wasn't hurting him at all. She was dying inside while he was peachy fine about everything.

"Nathan," Nathan stopped eating and looked up at April. "Yes, April?" April swallowed thickly. She knew how he was going to react.

"Do you ever wish you could go back to Afghanistan?" April asked.

Nathan narrowed his eyes at her; he knew where this conversation was going.

"April there is no way in hell the army is going to let you go. With what's going on with you in a couple of months, you're not going to be allowed to fly anywhere." Nathan stated.

April pouted. "It was just an idea Nathan; I know I wouldn't be able to go." Nathan playfully rolled his eyes.

They were both miserable at Seattle Grace. They both needed to escape this hell hole of a workplace.

April had just finished an eleven-hour shift. She was dead tired, all she wanted to do was leave and sleep the night away.

As She was walking past the Nurse station, she saw Jackson and this blonde woman talking. They looked very smitten; it made Aprils stomach turn. They were both in their regular clothing and looked like they were going somewhere together.

April walked with her head down and got into her car. As she was pulling out of her parking space, she saw this new doctor and Jackson get into his car together.

She had taken one more deep breath before she choked a sob out. April drove home in silence tears were silently running down her face.

She arrived at Arizonian's apartment and quietly went into the building. As she went into the elevator, April broke down even more. Her sobs were echoing off the walls; it was slapping her in the face on how alone she was.

April whipped her eyes with her sleeves. I'm a soldier, remember I am a soldier. April was about to open her door when Marks door opened. Jackson and this Doctor were laughing together. They came to a stop when they saw April; it turned awkward for everyone but April.

Mark went out into the Hall to ask Jackson something but saw April and soon grew quiet as well.

April took a deep breath. She had enough of this; everyone was awkward around her because they like Jackson, not her.

"April are you…okay?" Jackson finally broke the silence.

April gave him a bored expression. Her eyes were puffy; her hair was in an ugly ponytail. She was seeing some Beautiful non-pregnant Blonde talking to her ex-husband. His smile was something April had failed to accomplish.

"I'm all right."

April opened the door and slammed it shut. Arizona was on a date tonight, so she was alone.

April dropped her purse by the door and took her phone out of her pocket. She slid down the door and dialed his number.

She waited for the ringing to start up. It took one ring for him to pick up.

"Kepner, what can I do you for?"

"Do you still have that job opening?"

The man chuckled on the other line.

"I'll be there in the morning. Get some rest."

April cried in the shower; she wanted to be married again. She wanted her family whole again. She could not be pregnant alone anymore.

April walked into the ER with a frown. She couldn't be a mother; she couldn't even be Samuel's mom. She couldn't even be a good wife.

April quietly moved about through the trauma center keeping to herself. She's seen pregnant women with their husbands all excited. She put her hand on her belly and longingly looked at these mothers.

Mark happened to be in the ER as well and was keeping an eye on April after last night. He knew after the death of her and Jackson's child she took it harder than Jackson realized. April was talking to Dr. Reed when she abruptly left the trauma center. Mark took his gloves off and followed her.

She was huddled over a trash can. Mark sighed, he took his gloves off. She whipped her mouth off and sighed. She didn't want to be pregnant anymore; she couldn't handle doing this alone. When she turned around, she was startled when she saw Mark staring at her.

"C-can I help you, Dr. Solan?" April choked out.

"Kepner, are you okay?"

"I am okay; I need to get back to work," April said.

She tried to move past Mark, but he wouldn't budge. He was giving this scrutinizing stare. He could tell something was up with her, she had dark circles under her eyes. She stopped being overly confident as well.

"No your not, go to the on-call room and sleep. You need it, and Kepner I better not find you in the trauma center anytime soon." Mark ordered.

April rolled her eyes and walked to the on-call room. She needed a long nap; maybe she'd treat herself to a nice burger.

As she walked by everyone, she just wanted to get away. The whispers were getting annoying. The sad stares that her marriage was over, she couldn't do anything to make that feeling of loneliness go away.

April opened the door of the on-call room. She almost screamed she saw all sorts of colors. Jackson and that Blonde woman together, their clothes half off. Jackson looked mortified, and the woman looked embarrassed.

"Um…Sorry. I'm just…. I'm gonna go now." April squeaked out.

She slammed the door and scurried away. He was moving on with his life while she was stuck in her past life. April saw Merideth and Derek talking having a somewhat funny conversation.

She walked past them not sparing them a glance. Not like none of them would talk to her anyway. Nobody cared for April at Seattle Grace, and she was okay with that. She was upset about being alone; she wanted friends. She wanted someone to talk to; she wanted a support group. That wasn't Reed or Arizona; she needed comfort.

April walked to the entrance of Seattle Grace; she needed some air. She sat on the bench and started crying. She could not be strong anymore; she couldn't even be strong for her failing marriage.

"What's an incredible trauma surgeon like you doing outside?" The voice was gruff and profound.

April looked up and smiled slightly.

"Hey, Ma-ax." She hiccupped.

Max dropped his smile and wrapped his arm next to her. He let her cry. Her pager was going off but she paid it no mind. April missed having a simple life.

When she called Max, he had already made the choice for her. She'd be leaving tonight to move to New York to become the trauma surgeon for his hospital.

"Hey let's get out of here, I know you're hungry," Max murmured.

April just followed the motions. She went back into the hospital and collected her things in silence. Many doctors didn't even acknowledge her; she's the invisible doctor of Seattle Grace. The annoying red head as Alex tells her from time to time.

As she left the attending changing room, she saw the blonde doctor and Jackson laughing along with Mark and Derek. April wanted to burst out into tears; she wanted to be that doctor. Having everyone adore you and not be that annoying doctor.

April took a deep breath and walked out of Seattle Grace. Max was giving her a small smile, a promise of something better finally was coming to her.

At that moment, she could take all the help and hope that was willing to follow her way.

 _Yeah, it's been a while since I've updated anything in general. Hope you like my spin on jaspril. I stopped updating stories for some of the comments that were given to me and left. If you like the story thanks, but I'm going to leave it at this. I've had a new version of new hero typed out for a good year with a different concept, but many of you were rude to me. So I just left the file on my laptop to not be touched. Every story I have had at least a new and improved version of what I want from my idea. All the stories will not be updated at once, but slowly your feedback will tell me what to tweak and put more emphasis. But I will say this New Hero's updated version will make you wonder what I've been doing for a while. The update will be early in the morning._


	2. I'm Out

_We as Doctor's are always looking for a reason why something has failed._

April woke up with puffy red eyes; she was an emotional wreck. Ryan had asked if she wanted company but she kindly declined, they would meet up later at the hospital. She did not want to burden him with her issues; she did call him to Seattle out of the blue. April has been contemplating for the last fifteen minutes whether or not to enter the building of her workplace. She's never called in sick and has no making sick days she accomplished over the years; she could use one today. Maybe that will annoy every and then they'd talk about her even more how she's failed to move on from Jackson while he has from her.

 _Was our technique the cause, was the patient not physically robust enough to handle the surgery._

As April walked into Seattle Grace she barely was acknowledged, she immediately walked up to the nurses station and took her tablet. She was looking down so no one would even attempt to ask her to do something. She was in no mood to emotionally deal with anyone; she just wanted to take a long swig of her favorite drink. It's only seven in the morning, and everyone has driven a pregnant woman to that degree of stress.

 _We tend to believe that we are invincible, but what we as surgeons learn. We are not. We are only human._

April was heading down the busy halls of Seattle Grace when she spotted Jackson with the blonde doctor. Everyone seemed to enjoy her presence; nobody honestly liked April only Jackson. April subconsciously put her hand on my stomach; she vowed to be the mother and father for her baby. She decided last night; she would not involve Jackson in any way. He left her; he called quits while she attempted to repair their marriage. He used others to distract her from the big picture at hand; she only had Jackson. Arizona can't keep a secret, and she was too obnoxious to become friends with the other doctors before Nathan came along. Jackson deserved to be happy even if that meant April lost her happiness along the way; she owed him that.

April's knuckles were turning white from the deadly grip she processed on her tablet. Mark Sloan, was talking to the duo and having a wonderful time, and April knew she was about to ruin their fun.

"Dr. Sloan, here are the scans you requested for your patient from yesterday."

April handed the tablet off to the Sr. Attending, everyone in the group stopped talking and stared at the young trauma surgeon. They gave her a look to disappear and that she desperately wanted too.

Mark's expression changed from joyous to grim. His patient was dying fast; she had a tumor that was pressing on her brain. Before he could go into a repair her face from a severe car accident she was in yesterday, he needed Derek to remove the tumor.

"Damn it…" Mark whispered. He glanced up at the redhead; he glared at her. "Take her up and get her a CT and page Dr. Bailey. Page me when you're done." He forced the tablet back to April; she winced due to the tablet hitting her chest.

Jackson sighed dramatically and followed suit, leaving the blonde doctor and April alone in the hallway. He was a drama queen at times in April's opinion, but then again he and everyone else at her workplace liked him more than her.

"So, I haven't introduced myself to you yet. I'm Dr. Michele Mayer I've transferred from John Hopkins; I'm the new head of trauma." She said.

As Michele was going to shake her hand, someone had called her name in the distance. She then abruptly walked away from April, leaving her in stunned silence. April was supposed to be head of trauma. Owens said he would name her this Friday. It's only Thursday, what the heck happened. Who found this girl in this short amount of time, why did everyone have to ruin her day?

April could feel the tears; she wanted to cry. But I'm A Solider she just needed to find Owens and clear up any confusion. She twisted the skin on her hand to stop the tears. She did not want to look weak in front of anyone.

April was sitting in CT waiting for the patient to be ready. She was silent the entire time; the nurses had tried to interact with her. But she wanted none of that. April just wanted to be alone for the moment; she needed time to process what was to come about from her life. She needed a vacation from everyone.

The Patient had organ failure due to a tumor. Nothing was being probably taken care of in this woman's body. But she was only coming in because of a car accident that broke her nose. She was dying, and no one could truly help her, only slow down the process.

April heard the beep of the computer. She slowly walked into the CT chamber and rolled The patient out of the machine. It's very emotional knowing your patient is dying. The woman was a mother of three; she didn't deserve anything she was forced to endure.

"Let's get you ready for surgery; We'll take this one step at a time I promise." April squeezed her hand.

The nurse had come in with the gurney, they transported the patient and exited the room. April was oddly quite, that did not go unnoticed at Seattle Grace, but nobody was friendly enough with the red head to ask her what was wrong. Or honestly, bring them to care. When April was having an emotional day, she truly was happy nobody wanted to talk to her about what she was feeling. She'd rather

As the turned the corner April spotted Mark and Michele walking into the OR. She did not want to talk to the doctors. They were good friends of Jackson, who always would complain about her to Mark. He'd always be rude to her for a week and treat her with nothing but disrespect because he's following "bro" code. She disliked everyone when they'd take Jackson's side in an argument.

She followed suit, leaving Karen with the nurse at hand. Mark and Michele were both laughing but stopped once they realized April was in the room.

"Dr. Sloan, here is the CT Sc-AH-an." April yelped.

She placed her hand on her stomach and hunched over. The pain was sharp and felt like a stab to the stomach. April's breathing became labored. She forced herself upright; both attending's were looking at her questioningly. She handed the tablet off to him and walked out the surgical room. She had no idea what caused her pain, but she didn't want to know why.

April found a bench and sat down. She closed her eyes and began to take deep breaths. Her breathing was labored.

"Well if it isn't April Kepner my ex-daughter in law."

April had taken another deep breath before she forced her eyes open. Catherine Avery, the devil reincarnated herself. April never hated anyone, but Catherine comes to a close I want to push you in traffic.

"Hello, Catherine."

April forced a smile, but she was so tired she could care less.

"Do you know where my son and his new "friend" are?" Catherine said smugly.

April closed her eyes; she needed coffee or a drink before she could deal with another Avery hurting her.

"Dr. Mayer is in surgery and as for your son I do not know, and I could be careless right now. If you need me, Dr. Avery, I have patients to tend to right now."

April slowly got up and brushed past the stunned doctor. She turned the corner and bumped into Derek. Meredith was right next to him and gave her a dirty look. Usually, April would attempt to apologize, but she couldn't bring herself to care.

"Oh, sorry Dr. Shepherd."

April brushed past them as well and continued to the trauma unit of the hospital. As she entered the trauma center, she immediately spotted Jackson and Owens talking. She walked up to the duo, and they stopped their conversation, Jackson looked ready to walk away from her.

"Your mom is looking for you Dr. Avery." She said. Jackson was surprised she didn't call him by his first name, or attempt to make conversation with him. She turned to Owens "Also, I'm leaving for the rest of the day I have an emergency to take care of. And I hope you got the email I sent you this morning Chief."

April left before anyone could say a word to her. She entered the attending lounge; nobody was in the room. April collected her belonging; she knew it was time for her to leave Seattle.

April had her last doctor's appointment in Seattle this afternoon. Her baby is safe and healthy, and she already has a doctor waiting for her in New York, she'll meet with him on Monday.

Arizona had dinner with Sofia, Mark, and Callie, so April was alone tonight. She chose, this time, to pack up her belongings. She didn't want to explain to Arizona why she was leaving; she just needed time to leave and be by herself again.

April walked out of the apartment and walked across the hall to Mark's; she knew there was a fifty-fifty chance Jackson was there. She just didn't want to deal with the trouble of going all the way to his apartment and speaking with him.

 _We as Doctors are afraid of change, we are quick to stay with the same routine_

She knocked three times and waited. She heard shuffling going on from inside the apartment; the door slowly opened up. Jackson's clothing was all over the place on his body. April was not a fool she knew he had a guest over with him. April felt like crying, but she knew it wasn't the time.

 _It only takes one time for a mistake to be made, for us to change our opinion_

"Jackson, may I talk to you quickly?"

Jackson sighed "Can you make it quick?" Jackson took a step outside the apartment.

He gave her a look of making it quick. She took a deep breath and fiddled with the hem of her shirt.

"So I wanted to ask you...um. If I happened to be pregnant how would you take it?"

 _we can't be afraid of change; we have to go head first in a new environment to know it's okay to want something new._

Jackson looked livid. "April, if you happened to be pregnant is this some sick way of making me stay with you by coming up with this idea? April was over okay, just let me live my life in peace already right?" Jackson said.

 _Sometimes were given second chances._

April should have started crying; she instead grew a small smile. She turned on her heels and left him in the hallway alone. Ryan was sitting on the couch with April's bags pack. He was on his tablet looking over patient information that hospital had sent him.

April knew this move was a step in the right direction, but she was also scared as well.

 _But that makes surgeons so great, we adapt to change easily_

 ** _Yep, here is chapter 2. I've been working non-stop this week. But I will upload Scream and Shout tomorrow afternoon the revamped version. But in this story, Arizona does not know about April. Only two people know about her pregnancy. I changed Max's name to Ryan because of a reason you'll know later. Yes, Jackson will find out but much much later. Hope you all like it._**


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